A Love Letter to Sydney

It’s been a year since last December and I find myself, by an intriguing coincidence, sitting near the South Pylon of the Sydney Harbour Bridge, where I wrote my last Christmas entry. I must really like the idea of myself writing on re-purposed food packets next to pretty views.

Last Christmas I thought it was a good time to reveal some of the life experiences which have influenced my world-view. While most of the time I’m a nit-picking control freak, I am pretty certain that seeking beauty in the mundane and giving generously to others, does make life a lot more enjoyable. Twelve months ago it was thought that by today, I’d be sharing New Years Eve with somebody else; while it seems that this premonition was poorly grounded, I’ve come to realise that it’s not such a big issue after all.

Sydney: I’ll love her forever, how could anyone not :D

It’s 6:45 on Christmas Eve morning, and the rising sun glistens over our beautiful harbour. It turned out that I arrived 5 hours early for an 11:00 ‘breakfast’ for displaced men in the city. I’m filling in time now, watching the Disney Wonder cruise patrons disembark, two by two. There’s something about the Christmas week that makes Anglo-Saxons suspiciously more congenial, and I’m enjoying seeing this rare theatre unfold while it lasts.

I’ve always loved people watching, especially the observation of happy people. I think they have a warmth which stems from a rich understanding of humanity’s interconnectedness. The glow they emit possesses an infectious magnetism; people want to be around, and to be like them.

A classic Disney message for the year x

…Back to my lack-lustre love life. At age 12 I was gifted a Claddagh ring by my mother. The Irish Lady in Disney world showed me how to wear it based on my relationship status, and it’s been on the same finger ever since. It got stuck the wrong way up last week because my hands double in size over summer. I’m pretty effective at warding off men as it is, so doubt the shift will catastrophically affect my current lifestyle, but I do quite like the way the heart looks when I glance at my hand now. I forgot that it’s always been complete, by the sheer fact it can love.

I think that good people aren’t always loved by the world, but in all cases they have a heart full of love for it. While the heart can receive love, I’ve come to see this as only a secondary and less consequential capacity, even though we’re naturally inclined to focus on it a great deal more. I think that the heart’s causative and defining power lies rather in its infinite capacity to bestow affection upon the world.

…Anyway, just some shower thoughts of mine ahahah.

How sweet is this message

And so it seems that 2024 will probably finish with little romance to speak of. A certain set of tranquil, kind, crystalline eyes were maybe never really for me to begin with, and my glacier-like heart may actually melt for the first time.

And yet with all of this I still think I’ll be fine.

💋 if you don’t use it, you could lose it 💋

People can simultaneously endure and give more than they realise. While hearts are fragile I don’t think they can ever bleed to a point where some output still isn’t possible. It’s really turned out to be quite a pretty day in Sydney, and I’ll probably need to start heading over to the hall in a sec. While arriving at dawn for a midday event probably screams ‘desperada,’ I’m not expecting any romantic encounters at today’s BBQ mingler. With that said, I have a feeling they’ll all be as happy to see me, as I will be them. And it’s kind of nice to realise that this alone can fill me up in the profound manner that it does.

Wishing everybody a beautiful year ahead; whatever it brings or doesn’t bring <3

Vonnie xx